There’s Power in Pain

I have the tendency to create work for myself even when I am on vacation. Most of it is productive self-growth work, that is actually worthwhile. The other is the human being’s classic tendency to overthink and create problems for themselves to deal with, in addition to the beautiful chaos that life is. To take a break from all of it, and to abandon my to-do list, I sat down with a magazine and a pair of scissors. I made some found poetry!

The fear of failing, recovering from failure, and keeping your head up no matter what has been on my mind lately. I found strength through my found poetry.  I found the strength to take some time off for myself to do the things I love and remind myself to be more compassionate toward myself. I am going to take the lessons I learn from my failures with me and use it as a fuel to continue to energetically chase after my dreams. I realize that it might seem terribly hard and painful at first, but rising up and rebuilding your strengths is what the world is waiting for you to do. The world is counting on you to continue your journey because no one else can do justice to excelling at it more than you ever can.

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Thank you to Writing 201 for introducing me to Found Poetry ^-^ here is another piece I made a while ago!

 

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thank u, nexus of all the beautiful things that life is made of

I am grateful
I am grateful for the air
that fills my lungs with life 
I am grateful for the water
that reminds me that you can be whoever you want to be
I am grateful for the beautiful blue skies 
and everything beneath them
I am grateful for everything that has built me up 
and everything that has left me broken
I am grateful for the victories that gave me strength
and the heartbreaks and mistakes that made me stronger
I am grateful for my mom, my dad, my sister 
and everyone else who feels like family
I am grateful for who I am, who I was, and who I will be
I am grateful for everything I have 
and everything that makes me, me
I am grateful for this beautiful world
that is home to the dark clouds of chaos
and yet, leaves room for a sky full of stars

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Pause everything you’re doing and take a moment right now to think of all the things you are grateful for!!! (:

The title of this post was a play on the name of the popular song thank u, next by Ariana Grande. I just wanted to leave this bit of information here to make sure you are not clueless if you are reading this in the future where the song is not relevant anymore. Literally, the only other world that begins with ‘nex’ was ‘nexus’, so I had to make do.
I do not know why I felt the need to do this, but here we are lol.

turbulent

I just found out that one of my personality types is ‘Turbulent’. Turbulent. YOU’RE SAYING I AM TURBULENT??? AAAH.

I think personality test makers get a good laugh out of just seeing ‘Turbulent’ people’s turbulent reaction to when they are told that they are ‘Turbulent’.

Come join the club if you have ever stressed about saying something out loud in the fear of what people might think. This could be pitching an idea in a super important meeting with people whom you really want to make a good impression on, or it could be saying hello like a normal person to your highly inconsequential and unrealistic crush. My heart literally beats faster than how fast I would run (no, sprint) out of the room in these situations.

At times like these, I like to step back. I take a step back and I listen to why my heart is racing and why my brain is thinking all the thoughts that it has ever thought in all of eternity, all at once. I listen carefully to that voice. I sit down next to it on the floor, patiently, understandingly nodding my head at every frantic explanation it tries to give me about why it’s doing what it’s doing. And I smile. I smile the biggest, most encouraging smile and I tell that voice, ‘You care so much!! You care about the impact you make on this big beautiful blue planet even though you are a tiny blob sitting here on the floor! I am proud of the ever-trying always-enthusiastic blob you are. The world loves you for how much effort and thought you put into each word you utter. More importantly, the world loves you for exactly the happy little blob you are, regardless of the constant state of chaos you find yourself in. If panicking a little bit is just the normal chain of things that need to be put into play for you to be satisfied with your efforts, so be it. Just remember that the world cares about you just as much you care about it. The amount of kindness and care that you send out is what should be in your life’s inbox, waiting to love you back for the amazing little blob that you are. If for some reason, your inbox seems to be empty and devoid of the reflection of the love you beam out to the world, consider refocussing that vibrant burst of energy that you possess somewhere else. Direct it towards someone or somewhere more deserving of your sparkling presence”.

“You may be turbulent, but know that you’re a turbulent storm of a beautiful and incredibly positive energy that you strive to gift to the world, just so that you can be the shining star to someone’s dark skies.”

I am an INFJ-T! What about you?